>Jizz on the floor
This night I ejaculated onto the floor of a bathroom shower. I shaved my pubic hair off and am in my 20s, and this night something odd happened. I have stuck a finger up my anus before, and while showering this night, I thought it would be interesting to put two fingers into my asshole. I put my index finger 👆 and middle finger 🖕 of my left hand into my butthole then grabbed my penis with my right hand and masturbated. I was on all fours masturbating on the shower floor. When I orgasmed I was not even sure if I orgasmed or not. It was one of the most disappointing faps I've ever had. It was such a weak orgasm that I wasn't sure if I came or not. Last time I masturbated was yesterday night, or maybe it was two days ago. I should have stuck with a plan I had of fucking this artificial vagina thing that I have.
Before this night the last thing I masturbated to was an overweight woman. She wasn't really fat. She was just overweight. She was sorta sexy. The video that she was in was a porn or erotic vid from the 1980s I think.
>Pour coffee on it and forget about it
Sounds like a bad idea. Someone might see it and correctly identify it as semen: unless the coffee does something I don't know about. Coffee on a shower floor is sus. Last time I drank coffee was in 2021-06-29 or 2021-06-30 late in the morning. I'm in the mountain time zone in the USA. Wasting coffee sounds like a bad idea. I'd rather drink half a gallon of coffee in one sitting.