Once upon a

time, I sucked

at playing tabletop

games, so I

drank some ketchup

mixed with gunpowder

then woke up

next to a

super duper cute

loli. Then the

loli cuddled me

stop being creepy

“ complained a gay

loli molester table.

I forgot why

my brother dresses

like a fruit

but it's okay

because I also

like butt stuff

Anyway, so yesterday

I was walking

loli loli loli

down the loli

by the loli

until the loli

loli'ed a loli

loli's'ed've'ly'aint the loli

. Enough lolis, now

the truth is

I am gay

, or, more accurately,

super, double gay.

make america great

more like gay

that's why lolis

are the best.

The exploding cat

with weird eyes

landed on the

mountain of God.

He sought after

the mystical artifact

that would grant

illegal weeb powers

, including the ability

to restart threads

Once upon a

Midnight dark, He

said “Let there

Be light, and

no more stories

about lolis". And

then He banned

all the creeps.

He felt victorious.

Nevertheless, the shota

, His otouto, said, "

The industrial revolution

σανεδ υς αλλ

“ and He answered

LET THERE BE

poop fart ass

dick shit butt

for Christmas. Furthermore

Santa was arrested

for reindeer abuse

and sodomising elves.

Ass ass ass

step on the

grass grass grass,

but suddenly the

Politburo decreed that

ur mom gay

to the surprise

of all involved!

Suddenly, thousands of

hungry Latvians swarmed

across the border

of my conciousness

and danced lazily

to the music

of my ass

The smell was

very nice but

overpowering. I had

eaten chocolate pudding

in the rain

because my sister

keep nagging about

gay frog chemicals

which transmogrified her

delicate facial features

into those of

ahania from scotland

. However, unfortunately the

sneaky face thieves

shat all over

her prized collection

of dragon dildos,

and that's terrible

, really really terrible.

Seeking revenge, she

wore the legendary

tongue piercing of

anuses and buttes.

The piercing's magical

powers of rape

terrified me so

so much that

pints of piss

flowed through my

thick, veiny penis.

I started farting

a harmonious melody

and was evicted,

that's why. Never

wiggle a cheetah's

tail without it's

(I meant its)

consent. The law

says so. Or

so I thought

before I read

"Harry Potter and

the lack of

competition in the

corn derivatives market."

I realized that

there's no rules

in this shitty

world, and that

American Cultural Imperialism

must be destroyed

, said the cuck.

So I ventured

far into the

sun, where I

instantly melted. Then

I turned into

a depressed ghost

reeking of raw

fish and cum.

It's an improvement

from before, now

I can possess

lolis. Very nice.

Dwelling on this

newfound ability, I

ass ass ass

vacation, I stuttered.

My mom said

"You're moving with

great speed”, so

I slow down

but I get

itchy balls and

I start weeping

, reconsidering my choice

of makeup brand.

Suddenly, I trip

balls on DMT

and small pieces

of my brain

are found in

a jar. How

many of them

will grow into

upstanding citizens is

up to their

worlds of imagination

in which spores

from the imagination

are processed into

pink imagination slime

shaped into nuggets

representing their futures.

basted

>>179
with three

gallons of cum

, the taste is

cum-like with a

twist of lemon

. Eat pineapple so

your defecation becomes

very sweet and

bitter like a

10,000% cacao nightmare

This has no

bearing whatsoever on

the matter of

my open heart

surgery. "Scalpel," said

the catgirl surgeon,

as she performed

the Fortnite dance.

She cuts open

the grape's skin

and extracts its

gory, pulsating heart.

The next step

is to fetch

sweet, mineral springwater

from the deep

streets of R'lyeh

And then i

was a young

Amazon delivery drone

on its first

dangerous delivery. Daring

stunts are encouraged

for client satisfaction.

I deliver a

delicate dildo downtown

dawdling delicately despite

it's crunchy texture,

and badass decals.

Twice upon a

splendid summer sunset

sixty shiny swords

destroyed the infidels

allah hu akbar!

It was beautiful

when she farted,

six silver snakes

slithered out of

her pristine toilet,

then slid up

to the shower

and showered all

and showered all

and showered all

shower it did

so much showering

can't be good

, said the Jew.

Despite the rain

being completely acid

I became cleansed

of my flesh

becoming the pinnacle

of human beauty.

I head to

work! work! work!

To get my

183635819th paycheck of

the day. With

joy for work

comes a deep

dark fantasy: the

beautiful scent of

bottled urine permeates

>>251

10 goto 20

litres or so.

So it begins

with stinky farts

that are toxic

to the environment.

We need to

eat more cabbage,

it is good

for your skin

, your foreskin, and

the PLANET, you

literal human trash

, go die already.

Mass sterilization is

for white people.

I can't stop

eating so much

vasque nigger sperm

glazed donuts. Furthermore,

I also can't

feel my legs

, why? Abducted by

Reisen Udongein Inaba

on New Year's

Steve, which is

a gayer version

of Apex Legends.

nigger nigger nigger

“ was heard across

the kingdom of

overt racism, and

all was well.

Until one day

when my toilet

was overflowing with

fluffy cotton candy,

and I realized

it was coming

out of my

mom's basement, so

I investigated downstairs

298 flights of

stairs conveniently skipped

and broke my

cassette tape collection!

this is unfortunate

, obscene, and alarming

I dialed 911

but they didn't

love ass custard.

How could they?

So I turned

down for what,

but no one

likes boomer songs.

How could they?

Boomers really need

medical attention, their

mothers always said,

"I love black

licorice scottie dogs

." That's because they

love black licorice

which is terrible

at tasting bad

. My cringe compilation

grows every day

, just like my

dead wife collection

. All my wives

had in common

they were men.

My grammar bad.

AND I NEED

quality financial advice,

because my spreadsheets

have fallen into

the depths of

the recycle bin

of history. Many

internet historians unanimously

agree that they

are imbeciles. Furthermore,

all things considered,

their very existence

is an insult

to my penis.

Penis inside Jkid.

Help me get

back my penis.

from in Jkid

penis penis penis

" said my imouto*

*Translator's note: "imouto"

means little sister

who is Jkid

some wanker probably

thinks this is

some kind of

joke. Its not.

I really like

Jkid. He is

a person probably

. (Narrator: he wasn't.)

(Narrator: he's black)

(a black hole)

Who said that?

(hey, shut up)

Voices in my

pudding keep on

calling out to

Jkid, who is

currently sleeping. Please

talk about Jkid.

Don't do it.

Suddenly, a bee

ＥＡＴ ＹＯＵＲ ｏｗｎ

ＯＦＦｓｐｒｉｎｇ ＴＯ ｐＬＥＡＳＥ

ＭＹ　ＤＵＢＳ、ＣＨＥＣＫ’ｅｍ

Bees are dangerous.

You must avoid

you must avoid

avoid the 'zoids

who are Jkid.

Where were we??

At Jkid's house.

It smells weird

and where's Jkid?

He's guzzling cum.

How's it taste?

Like fresh cum.

Ate some pineapples.

They were tasty

They were disgusting

Puked out pineapples

Flushed down toilet

Got flushed down

the toilet. Bye

Made my cum

taste very yum

not very healthy

to drink cum.

Hear that, mom?

She didn't answer

so I screamed

and screamed and

ejected a pineapple

from my ｏｗｎ

hidden multidimensional portal

in my ass

now its bleeding.

And then BLOOD

IS JUST GUSHING

OH GOD, CALL

JKID, HE KNOWS

MY DARK SECRET

ABOUT HOW MY

hidden multidimensional portal

in my ass

IS HELLISHLY PROLAPSED

AND SMELLS OF

SWEET TROPICAL PINEAPPLE

the weed number

was tragically wasted

, just like me

anyways quickly get

me to a

Suddenly, DOOR STUCK

HONEY! THERE'S HONEY

GLUING THE DOOR

WHAT DO WE

want to eat????

I BEG YOU

COOK LASAGNA PLEASE

Meanwhile, back at

the kingdom, a

loli ran for

exactly 24.65 miles

across the provinces

only to meet

a funny rabbit

Who spoke welsh

"datguddiwch dy fagina"

(TL: Welsh for

"Reveal thy cunny")

Begrudgingly, she accepted

FBI OPEN UP

bestiality is bad!

YOU'RE UNDER ARREST

for crimes involving

YOUR OWN ASS!

I'm shitting uncontrollably!!!!!!

Its getting everywhere!!!

I'll eat it!!

It tasted like

shit, really. What

a surprise. Now

PUT YOUR HANDS UP

(ban me now)

I can count

up to potato!

Ha ha, said

the fart man.

STOP INTERRUPTING ME

NO FUCK YOU

Fuck you leatherman

IT'S MY STORY

i'll show you

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Please wait warmly

Have some tea

(it's loli's pee)

, mind the bee

WHAT'VE YOU DONE

TO ME IS

TOTALLY UNCALLED FOR

, the rabbit cried.

Loli began to

picket my backdoor

with a needle

Ass sewed shut,

I cannot shit.

Why, loli, why?

Loli smiled and

started to feed

started to feed

FBI man a

>488's

4 words.

one two three

i gotta pee

so I leave

loli behind and

urinate into Jkid

.
======CHAPTER TWO: =======
=======THE

URINATING OF JKID=======

Seven years of

sodomy had passed.

Urine had flooded

Jkid's soul, and

all is piss.

From piss, rises

Jkid's life regrets.

Fart and shart

all over his

dirty fingernails, disgusting.

and but so

and but so

it was: eight

more years of

sodomy would follow

. And so, eight

more years passed.

Jkid's anus was

thoroughly urinated in.

Piss dribbled out,

onto the bees.

The bees swarmed

happily, whilst contemplating

those three words:

"420 blaze it"

SMOKE WEED EVERYDAY

It was beautiful

the bee colony

inside Jkid's anus

flourished, using my

diabetic piss to

make delicious honey.

deep in the

anal kingdom, the

king of shit

became jealous. He

couldn't stop shitting!!!!!!!!

It was such

a massive amount

the bees took

their fair share

of shit before,

but now shit

overfloods the market

leading to crisis

in wall street

. Home, at least

it was before

; all the piss

was safely invested

that I finally

found my lost

penis and balls

they were crushed

by a rock!

Sounds very painful

, but I loved

the sweet, sweet

release of death.

Years of urinating

on Jkid resulted

in elder gods

entering our world

through my urethra

. It's the end...

of Huawei phones

, said the NSA.

All the phones

have been put

on indefinite hold

thanks to Trump-sama,

and Ayatollah Khamenei.

Once again, the

Once again, the

double posting frustrated

the Ayatollah Khamenei.

Sugar accumulates centrally

Sugar accumulates centrally

inside Ayatollah Khamenei.

"Eid Mubarak!" said

an unexpected visitor

, as sugar accumulated

centrally inside Ayatollah

the winter grew

and grew and

sweet carrots birthed

baby carrots, which

blued when touched

with my dick

juice. Theoretically speaking,

carrots produce more

sugar during winter

so THEORETICALLY, Ayatollah

accumulates sugar centrally.

Licks out for

dead goddamn memes

and capitalist modes

of production. Accelerate

large turds from

the anus of

Ayatollah, who accumulates

sugar within his

bunghole. Nonetheless, despite

the exposed dicks,

no animals were

spared a buggering.

Pumping and pounding,

the secret cumster

in the second

dimension cums repeatedly

to the sound

of Sakura masturbating

to sugar, accumulating

centrally inside Ayatollah

After one year,

we'll split open

his fruity bunghole

to expose the

unholy citadel of

anally accumulated sugar

, where ass kilju

, having accumulated massive

karma. Therefore, when

the market explodes

, it will be

revolutionary, marking the

626th post in

The "ITT we

tell a story

three words at

a time" thread.

Fuckin eh mate.

I demand hostages.

Give me the

pepper, I require

for it shall

spice up my

bunghole, which accumulates

not sugar, but

modal logics and

cream of tartar.

Suddenly, a scream

in the woods

dislodges the sugar

which had crystallized

inside my central

nervous system. Value

comes from my

buttocks, having accumulated

all the sugar

tits and delightful

honey cocks, I

amassed a great

unholy citadel of

6 years' worth

of the finest

sages and "ru"s,

which one day

a little girl

found in the

post-apocalyptic ruins

a magic dildo

with powers of

deleting shit posts

She took it

in the ass

and liked it

just kidding, she

weaponized it and

conquered the citadel

of sages and

fucked myself in the ass because

over three words

fit inside my

tiny little brain's

sci-fi toaster

for nice crispy

crunchity ridged chips

from McCoy's crisps

the crisp capital!

I threw up

all of it

into a large

polished olympian dam

I was careless

to allow myself

to get sucked

off by koifish

It feels very

Delta P, fuck

I will change it to 7 words.

No you won't

And he didn't

so everyone rejoiced.

Was it over?

Was it really?

No one knows

No-one will ever

No-one will ever

Fatal error. Restarting...

Once upon a

time, there was

a little loli

with the name

JEWS

That's not three

...she was four

hundred years old.

I smelled her

poop filled anus

and her drenched

sweaty mayo filled

spicy tuna roll

We laugh together

( ´ω`) and grow fat

and old together.

Gross old hag

was my wife

until she died.

Years later, I

feel it kicking

and squirming in

my big bum

ready for birthing

when suddenly, I

dropped the ball

over my neighbour

, marking the an(nu)al