It was a dark and stormy night,
and got me drunk on her delicious
loli oni pee. The New World Order
hates loli oni pee but strangely likes
Japanese Supreme Court seal dragon experts. And
now for something completely different, Ibuki Suika
will pee on my face for the
seventh time tonight. Remember my old, decaying
brain? Didn't think so. Neither do I.
The final solution to the jewish problem
involves eating their own children as usual
Abenomics didn't work, we didn't make any
loli oni to alliveate the sake from
worldwide onii-chans that need a kawaii loli
to love and hug. Sadly, the onii-chans
are race traitors. Shrek is love, Shrek
. Multiple armored vehicles were spotted heading to
DADDYCOOL's mansion. It is believed they're after
the vast sequestered methane and carbon reserves
for use in terraforming. How naive; they
don't even suck cock. Plebs. My Little
Friend is capitalized for some reason, perhaps
it is simply the Ideon's will. Oh,
the old man scoffed as he spoke
WITH AN IMMENSE CAPS LOCK FURY TO
my anus, which was haxed by the
animation staff working on My Little Pony.
‘‘BACK IN MY DAY, THERE WAS SHADING!’’
The animators, moved by his passion, decided
to commit suicide. Thus began the great
journey to defeat the legendary beast of
3D. However, they commited sudoku, not suicide
since we all love epic sudoku maymays
and twitching virginal trap cocks in frilly panties.
"I'm a big guy for you, CIA."
Said the guy waving loli panties in
complete bliss, while gently rubbing his massive
nose in the crusty patch left by
a stray bullet. The CIA reacted by
taking a long drag of his Cuban cigar
and straightening his bowler derby in a
provocative manner.
In the beginning, there was
a huge lot of abandoned striped panties
. And then God said "Let there be
lolis!" And there were lolis. And He
saw that it was good. The lolis
filled the earth, and subdued it. Then
the LORD told the lolis: "Be fruitful
and do arithmetic." But math is hard,
especially when one keeps getting distracted by
soft loli moans and wet, vaginal kisses.
Nonetheless, they persevered, and rigorously proved that
life is meaningless. This came as a surprise
party to everyone, as far as I'm
able to discern, if that makes sense.
Disappointed, the lolis decided that the only
proper way to skin a cat is
by not skinning it at all, ever
, and by instead petting and cuddling it.
Apparently, every character dies at the end.
Such is the fate of all mortals,
who abandon the way of the loli.
For the initiated few, the people who
fought their way through hell and back
were given one onii-chan to cherish and
extract all the blood from their bodies.
The immortal onii-chans gladly sacrificed their blood
and their immortality for a lewd kiss
SEVEN WORDS SEVEN WORDS SEVEN WORDS SEVEN
, the lolis chanted erotically, while I pounded
my fist against the wall in frustration.
refuse to acknowledge my dark sodomite lord,
who is really just lonely and misunderstood‽
I enjoy large penises inside of my
computer screen. They look a lot like
blimps and air ships and rockets and
similar artifacts of the phallic variety. In
fact, "phallic" even means penis-shaped! That
is what the dictionary says. And knowing
definitions can come in handy when you
need words to describe things, a dictionary
is not worth buying; use one online.
Anyway, getting back on topic, the lolis
are doing something odd.''
And sure enough,
they are doing something odd. Over at
Drew Pickles' premier gay strip club, which
only the gayest of faggots may enter,
heterosexual men were invading to steal the
dildis. "Those poor dildis", wept Ronald McDonald
(better known as The Penis Clown) "doomed
to be shoved up the vaginas of
women, who are not swell at all.
Just thinking about it makes me puke".
I'm not one for philosophical musings. So,
I'll just tell you straightforwardly and unpretentiously
the lolis are scheming behind the scenes
waiting for the right time to attack
the yummy snacks in the pantry. One
two three four five six seven words,