It was a dark and stormy night,
toe hoes, we need those hoes clean
but wow check out those ear lobes!
Henry felt the urge to snack on
twelve payments of only $49.99 a month
for high quality foot fetish art. Antidisestablishmentarianism
within Benedictson Benski's prolapsed butt; o sad toge
.
Meanwhile, in an alternate universe, a cute
toddler was usually considered quite the little
mischief maker! So the people elected to
abandon it in the middle of a
fish market. She ate all of
the delicious tuna, and then proceeded to
eat all of the non-delicious tuna.
What
a happy and fun day! Then she
died. Alas, fate is cruel. Food poisoning
claims the lives of over 15 poor
2018-5-3
holy fuck why is my internet speed literally slower than dial-up right now (yes, less than 56Kbps)
textboards are the only thing I can browse
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
2018-05-16
Zlatan Ibrahimović and his sidekick
who shall remain nameless for copyright reasons.
Their plan to fight food poisoning involves
letting everyone die by gunshot instead. Clever
thinking, but it was not enough to
untangle the knots tied with my penis.
"Excuse me sir, you're due for an
hero. Please kill yourself by this afternoon."
Is what I would say if you
ever asked me for a bowl of
peeled grapes and called them eyeballs. Only
idiots think that works. I might scream, though.
However, it would be a muted scream
because I wouldn't like to wake my
dog, who has some INSANE pregnancy titties.
In fact, I just remembered that last
Monday I had my vocal cord surgery
to fix the damage caused by years
of testosterone exposure. Perhaps some day I'll
find the key to your heart. But
seriously though, trannies are mentally ill freaks.
I have fantasies of butchering strangers. Knives
aren't playthings and neither is my heart.
The quickest way to get there is
over the river and through the woods
where the scary monsters prowl. These monsters
can fit inside a glass jar and
trained to fight one another. You could
put bees up your ass if you
want to achieve supreme enlightenment, or maybe
just for fun. Remember to collect your
NEETbux before you walk out the door
cause you're not welcome anymore, for being
gay as hell and having AIDS. Faggot
you are, and will remain as long
as you sing songs sung by twintailed
majestic donkeys. the ones you know, the
very gay ones, the ones that can
bestow gayness upon even the most resolute
orthodox jew. The sound is comparable to
the cries of a cat getting raped
, which is how angels really sound like
in some of the medieval bible mistranslations.
So I invite you, dear friend, to
enter into a suicide pact with me.
The conditions basically are that I will
suicide you, then you suicide me, then
in office of local sucide prevention hotline
the suicide staff members also commit suicide.
The point of this is completely nonexistent
But I think you will find it
a reddit clone but with only downvotes
which is terrible, but not as terrible
as Facebook, which only has the upvotes.
or hacker news, which only features garbage.
So, do you accept? Please consider how
Donald Trump will make America great again
. But the more I spoke, I realized
that America was always kind of gay.
So I realized that in the end
that familiarity breeds contempt, and I've always
yearned for the sweet release of death.
I pick up a gun, point it
at my balls, and pull the trigger
. You know what word rhymes with trigger?
That's right: snigger. Which reminds me, once
you pop, you won't stop. That's guaranteed.
sex with negores
isn't enough to complete seven words, dumbass!
People on /dqn/ can't handle different opinions.
" Said the deficient channer with heavy complexes.
But I didn´t hear him because I
am smarter and with more sophisticated opinions.
I am also very close to being deaf.
That was thanks to my involvement in
the Royal Artillery, in the Great War.
But I can hear the desperate screams
even when I take a shit. Oh
man, were those fun times, my dude